Deja Vu all over again: The Rise, Fall, Return, Neglect and Rebirth of the Cuckoo Blog!

     Well, the blog is officially alive again.  We're back for the 13th time and this time much like the last time, we meant it when we said it last.  This time however, there are no rules.  We can only promise that it will happen once a week but also could be more than once a week.   We're ruled by inspiration and driven by desire which as you get older seems to fade.  Am I still talking about a blog?  Anyway,  we'd love and appreciate if you could not only read what we have to say but comment, talk about or scorn us for doing so and share with the masses in every state including Massachusetts.   No format at all.  It could be a few sentences about elevator farting or it could be an open letter to Ford Motor Company asking that spring loaded fists be installed in driver seats for deserving motorists who need a fist up their ass.

     Speaking of inner self, I was talking to my partner in comedy, Greg Law and we felt we needed more exposure and needed to see our ugly faces out there more.  It's been too long and we've both been exploring the other parts of life we never had before, like eating food on a plate versus pizza box tops and wire tapping.   The big fella has been living it up in our nation's capital (which I just learned is in fact, Washington DC), working for the man and also promoting his side venture, Cliqtrio.   It's currently on a break but trust me, its alive and kicking later in the year.  As for myself, I'm working that 9 to 5, fixing up the new house, family life, crying in my car while eating candy beans and at the crossroads of self appreciation and self deprecation.  It's been lovely but dammit, we're idiots  Born and bred to make fools of ourselves with no shame.   Kind of like congress.  

     So now that you're updated, we PROMISE to stay in touch literally and figuratively from this sentence on.  Please, please spread the word about our blog, redesigned website cuckoolounge, our comedic endeavors and side ventures.  In return, we'll hold each and every one of you on cold nights and feed you some cornbread.  Stay tuned......dot. dot. dot........

OH and feed our egos please!

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Honey Boo Boo means no harm.

     Normally I don't succumb to peer pressure and especially when it comes to television shows.  I've backed away from shows like Game of Thrones and fought off numerous advances to fall into the world of True Blood.  Not that there is anything wrong with those shows but I prefer to sort of fall naturally in love with a show or shall I say become downright obsessed with them (Breaking Bad, Lost, Arrested Development).   Then came Honey Boo Boo Child which I'll quickly give the acronym HBBC.

    The aforementioned HBBC is one of those shows that is entertaining but for the wrong reasons. For those that don't know which included me, the show is a spin off of the show "Toddlers and Tiaras".  Apparently, Alana nicknamed Honey BooBoo (HBB) gained attention on that show for her antics and behavior which prompted the TLC network (which oh by the way is an acronym for The Learning Channel) to throw Alana and her wacky family an offer they couldn't refuse.  Her family includes her mother June, dad "Sugar Bear" who could easily be an uncle of mine and her sisters Lauryn, Jessica and Anna.   The obvious star of the show is the spunky and obnoxious Alana who's adventures through beauty pageant land are a riot.  I would say Alana does the beauty pageants and after the curtain goes down, Honey BooBoo is alive and kicking.  Her BooBooisms are basically her opinions on things happening around her and the show does an excellent job of catching those moments.  Like all reality shows,  you find yourself asking "Is this for rizzle?"   At least I do. For whatever reason, sometimes my mind speaks in shizzle fo' rizzle.   Blame Snoop Lion.  Anyway, here's an example.     When asked about her sister's newborn baby being born with a hand that has six fingers, HBB said "I wish I had an extra finger so I could eat more cheese balls."     .

     Yes, it's mindless television.   Yes, it's on the Learning Channel and you will learn nothing.   And yes it's very possible Alana and her family's future in television is fleeting and they will become fodder for TMZ at some point down the road.  The bottom line though is that they are on television and are currently PAID reality TV stars and guess what?   It's one of TLC's highest rated shows.   It's watched by millions and although I only watched two shows, it was curiosity that drove me to keep watching and the fact that I really did think Sugar Bear was my long lost uncle.  Say what you will about reality television but it gives normal people like you and me a chance to "shine" if even for one season.  I can't blame HBB and her family for taking the chance to exploit themselves to the world and have no shame in doing so.   It's a show about an American family that is.......different and might make you question your own family or if Social Services should be called on the HBB clan.  It did make me ponder a few things about life and the biggest question I asked myself?   What would I do if I had an extra finger?   Naturally, I'd make a show about it.    


P.S.  At least watch one episode and I recommend the "Sketti" episode.  HBB at her best.
   

Why Facebook is a joke to me.

      Facebook is a big joke to me.  What I mean by that is, I don't take it too seriously.  Shocker right?  Most of you know that I post a lot of silly, stupid, obnoxious, immature and random things on there and that's pretty much the sole purpose of  FB to me.  Don't get me wrong. I like to give birthday shout outs and sincere posts on the holidays or special days in my or your personal life and keep in touch with friendos in out of town type places but overall, I use it to test comedic material and see what audience it captures.  If I can make one person chuckle in their cubicle hell or while changing a diaper, then I've done my job.  What's awesome is there are lots of cool friends who play along and think the same way.  Once in a while I get a private message from someone who asks if there really was a warm chicken biscuit in my bed but thats neither here or there or in my bed.  And of course, FB is used to promote selfish endeavors like TheCuckooLounge or Cliqtrio, RaceforHope2014 and my partner in comedy, Greg Law a.k.a. The Walter Kronkite of the D.C. Limelight a.k.a. FHDeluxe! 

     During my daily adventures on FB, I notice that people use FB for many a different reason.  Some use it for laughs, some use it as a diary, some use it to make a point, statement or get attention.  Some use it to start a conversation, discussion or argument.  Some like myself, even use it to get opinions on everything from dentists to dog food to Christmas sweaters to advice on how to drink at work responsibly.  Guess what?  It's a social networking site that encourages you to share your feelings.  That's the point and its ok.  People can say and do whatever they want and will.  They can post pics of lasagna, their bunions or an extremely outdated photo of themselves at a more attractive time in their lives.

            I guess my point is, who cares.  We don't.  Neither should you but then again, go ahead and care.  Its for public consumption, constipation and regurgitation.    The obnoxious posts, blogs, videos, pics etc will carry on as they do.  I'll do my best as will the CuckooLounge to keep the our fans laughing out loud  (you'd be surprised how loud two people laughing together is!).   Our advice to you?  .  Tune in or tune out.  Much like good strong and clean underwear, we appreciate those that support.  And I encourage all 3 of our readers to keep updating statuses, relationships. locations, pictures etc.    Don't you love this incessant rambling?   Remind you of anything?   This should sit nicely on your feed in between Jenn's update regarding how her sports bra does not fit like it did in college and how Rob is down in the dumps, watching "Dear John" alone with some Schlitz Malt liquor and his new puppy "Brick" and donating tons of money to those extremely sad ASPCA commercials hoping to get the almighty "like".   "Like" us?

We're back a.k.a. The Cuckoo Redux

First and foremost, I would like to apologize to all five of our readers for not posting a blog since February!   Believe me.  I've had a lot to say and could have shared with the masses but allow myself to explain myself.  I was in prison.  Well not an actual prison but I just completed a two year stretch at George Mason University getting my Masters.   The good news is that I'm done and officially free of those educational chains.   The bad news is that I really feel like a recently released prisoner who is trying to adjust to the outside world again.  I feel like Brooks from Shawshank Redemption except I don't long for the confines of prison or a rigorous grad school program EVER again.

It might sound ridiculous to describe graduate school like its a prison sentence but in my case, it felt that way.  I mean I was alive and well for the last two years and did enjoy life's many wonders such as holidays, birthday parties and Papa John Sunday football deals but anytime I did anything outside of the curriculum, I encountered what I call "grad guilt".   The workload is intense and no matter how great of a student you are and how on top of things you are, there is always more you could do.  So while I'm sitting there thumbing through a Rolling Stone, I was constantly thinking that I had no time to read and that whatever was due that week needed to be done first.  Even after I completed it, it still felt like something was lingering over me.

And planning things?   Nope.  Someone could invite me to a square dancing event in November featuring the last twelve swimsuit models wearing nothing but twinkie creme and I would need to consult my syllabus, assignment log and calendar first.   If it fell anywhere near a paper being due, I'd have to cancel.   Sad isn't it?  I'm probably echoing the sentiments of many and I applaud you for doing it because it was hell for me.  I was a goof off slacker in high school, an older somewhat smarter goof off slacker in undergrad and found out quickly that I couldn't be that guy in grad school.  At any rate, it's over so now I can get back to what really matters in life.   Good family, good friends and good times.   As for this here blog?   There will be one a week at least and possibly more. Hopefully a new one every Monday.  Possibly two but let's not kid ourselves.  Since graduation, I've gotten really good at doing nothing so you may even read a blog about nothing which will probably be my longest.   Once again, feel free to critique, ridicule, applaud or enamor yourselves with the blog.  Doesn't matter what you say or think, this nonsense will be pumped out to the masses like gravy on turkey day.   Until next time my five readers!   

The Self Proclaimed Legend of the CuckooLounge!

      We're back for the first time!   What I mean by that is that we have been on a somewhat long hiatus but we have returned to fill your lives with stories, observations, musings and of course nonsensical ramblings.   This re entry if you will, shall define what the CuckooLounge is, what we're about.   This is probably where I should cue some sort of intro music and maybe some fog...
      
       It was a hot sultry night in the middle of Arkansas and my baby's mamma was eating an ice cream cone and......wait.  That's neither accurate or appropriate for this first blog.   Let's start over.   My name is Greg and my comedic partner in crime's name is...wait for it.  Greg.   We went to high school together but didn't really "know" each other until we both worked at a nursing home in Manassas, Va.  It was there that we found out we were complete clowns and that we shared an affinity for the comedic cult classic "Evil Dead 2".   This spawned many a conversation and then we realized we had a common comedic connection!  We stayed friends of course and acted foolish at every chance we had and that's pretty much been our m.o. ever since.     


       The concept of the CuckooLounge was originated back in 2001.   It was not an actual lounge or place per say but we considered it a happy place or a place that both of our minds could merge and create hilarity.   Like a state of mind or minds.  Before you think I'm referring to some LSD trip, the CuckooLounge wasn't born until January 1st, 2009.   Why then?  Why so long?  Well quite honestly, people with a wild sense of humor are often damaged or dysfunctional.  That's me for sure and Greg would probably agree.  From 2001 to 2009, we did our best to keep things rolling but life got in the way in the form of women, relationships, jobs, family, hemorrhoids, tennis elbow and the most recent addition to my medical condition "Cell bow".   Pretty standard situation.  My elbow develops pain while I'm on my cell phone.  Uhhh...moving on.   


       What gave us the motivation to finally make the CuckooLounge a name and not a place was a little independent film called  Good People.  Written and directed by our good friend Lewis Long III, Lewis Entertainment,   This film featured graphics and animation by Greg and I had my first speaking role in a movie!   After years of getting confused for Morgan Freeman, I finally got a role thanks to Lew.   We thought to ourselves that if Lew can do this than so can we.   And dammit the hell we have!    Since that fateful day, we've done 24hour film contests, script writing contests, competed in music video contests, supported numerous causes, emceed fundraising events and had not one but TWO pajama jammy jams.  For those non House Party fans, I'll explain that one another time, another blog.   


Where do we go from here?   That remains to be seen however we can promise you that it will be upward and onward.   I'll finish school in July and my full time hobby will be the CuckooLounge.   My partner in dramedy will be focusing on music and the production of such and we'll reconvene in the summer months BUT things will still be pumping out in some way, shape or form such as this blog, Twitter , Facebook, Youtube, Big Bingo nights at Stuckey's Truck Stop and many more!  All links for these pages are on the blog.  Minus the Big Bingo one.  

      




       

What if Peanut Butter and Jelly never met?

      I was driving down the road and saw this car with the most awful colors.  A bright almost florescent green with an almost mustard yellow trim. I thought to myself.  That doesn't go together at all.  Maybe its the way my mind works sometimes.  I always think things should fit or go together.  A strange but perhaps telling example is when I open a box of Samoas.  I may eat two at first but then I see that the row looks half empty and I'm compelled to eat the other two.   If I'm two cookies away from finishing the box, I'll finish them. It just doesn't ease my mind to leave two cookies in a box and put it away.  Finish them and be done.   Now that we've somewhat diagnosed me with OCD and I've failed to explain what I mean, I'll try again.
        It makes me wonder why things go together or what makes two strange things work well together?   My prime example is peanut butter and jelly.   Peanut butter with its...well peanut butter taste and jelly with its sugary sweet taste often highlighted by grape, strawberry or peach flavoring.   It seems odd to put those two together yet they are a match made in sandwich heaven.   I've heard rumblings of peanut butter and bananas,  Pb with honey and Pb and pickles.  They may all be wonderful pairings however let us remember that peanut butter and jelly blazed the trail originally. 

       I guess my point in all this nonsensical rambling is that sometimes in life things fit that shouldn't or things go together like peas and carrots despite looking like mayonnaise and meatballs.  My advice?  Don't knock anything until you try it.  I used to eat my eggs naked but now its hot sauce or ketchup.  I used to use only ketchup for my fries but now mayonnaise has been added.  I used to put orange juice in my Coors light.  Wait...that was my roommate.  What mixes well for you may not mix well for me but that's life baby.   I'm not entirely sure this blog will make any sense to anyone but its good to be back!  

Kool Aid smile, Dirt on my shirt and my Huffy...

Yesterday was the first day of the summer and also the longest day of the summer.  Some would say its all downhill from here but I think it's only just begun.   Naturally my nostalgic mind went into overdrive and for those that know me well, I like to dabble in nostalgia but don’t dwell.  I’m all about the good times but also love making new good times if you will.  Anyway, I started thinking about my childhood summers and how different each one seemed to be.   As a grown man (chronologically that is), it’s all sort of like that old viewfinder toy we played with as kids.   Here I am sitting at work clicking one picture at a time. 

My summers as a kid were spent for the most part at someone else’s house.  My parents were young parents and also both young working parents so I was shipped around to different babysitters.   My wonderful grandmother (God rest her soul) Pearl raised me for the most part.   I can remember her teaching me my ABC’s, 1, 2, 3’s and also the value of making quality tea and tuna sandwiches.  She always spoiled me and our trips to Woolworth’s for grilled cheese sandwiches and chocolate shakes will always make me smile.  I was also raised by two very special Aunts named Brenda and Pat.   I spent a lot of weekends and weeks during the summer when my mouth was wired shut.  (Long dental story to be told later).   Chocolate milk, dart gun fights with my cousins and watching Lethal Weapon with my Uncle Tom are good memories.    Many countless memories at my Aunt Pat’s house.   Crushing Doritos, feeding ponies, playing “Jason” in the woods with her sons Brian and Andy (my brothers), listening to Nascar races on the radio, enjoying my other Uncle Tom’s tea  and all night Nintendo fests with Blades of Steel, Double Dribble and Ikari Warriors.  The all nighters were probably courtesy of that sweet tea and numerous sodas that we often brushed our teeth with. 

Days like today make me want to go back to those innocent days.   No bills, no appointments, no responsibility and no commitments.   Days where I could wipe my mouth on my shirt, eat however many Ho Hos I wanted to and drink copious amounts of Kool Aid.  Days when the sound of the Ice Cream man was the only thing I heard other than my Mom or Dad calling me in at night.   Riding bikes, shooting bottle rockets of the balcony, walking to 7-11 to get the Biggest Gulp I could carry and sneaking into a neighborhood pool.   I could go on and on but that would take many blogs and a lot of my time here at work.   Besides, I always carry a viewfinder in my head to flip through all the good times.  Times are good now and 20 years now, I’ll look back and laugh at the fact that I wrote this blog while working.   And no matter what technology is out there, I’ll still use my viewfinder.